Worst movie accents
You plunk down $10 for a movie you’ve been dying to see, only to spend the next two hours curled up in agony because one or more actors are sadistically butchering their accents. Infuriating business. I think that accent coaches should be listed high up in a movie’s credits, so the fans know whose house to burn down, once the lights come up. Here’s a list of what I believe are some of the worst movie accents in recent memory:
1. Connie Nielsen in Basic: Born in Denmark, fluent in Italian; tackles a Southern accent. Yikes.
2. Kristin Scott Thomas in Random Hearts: The "English Rose" plays a Congresswoman from a New England state. Uh huh. Who casts these movies?
3. Rachel Weisz in Runaway Jury: An American accent… I think. Sigh. Poor vowels.
4. Liam Neeson in Kinsey: Again with the nasality. I’m starting to get a complex. Do we really sound like this?
5. Kevin Costner in Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves: Like shooting fish in a barrel.
6. Kristin Scott Thomas in The Horse Whisperer: KST strikes again. She’s ENGLISH, dammit, ENGLISH!
7. Emma Thompson in Primary Colors: My hero Emma almost pulls it off, but falters in the more emotional scenes.
8. Jeremy Irons in Die Hard: With a Vengeance: Don’t combine a creepy Geman accent with a lisp and nursery rhymes. Ever.
9. Brad Pitt in Meet Joe Black: I went back and forth on this one, but finally decided that, yes, stupid is an accent.
10. Kate Beckinsale in Van Helsing: It’s official–I’m obsessed. I still chewed through a throw cushion when she said "I think that’s earned him a drink."
Honorable mentions:
Rachel Weisz in Constantine, Jeremy Irons in Dungeons and Dragons, Anthony Hopkins in Bram Stoker’s Dracula AND The Mask of Zorro, Brad Pitt in Seven Days in Tibet AND The Devil’s Own, Tom Cruise in Far and Away, Richard Gere in Sommersby AND The Jackal, Angelina Jolie in Tomb Raider, Gwyneth Paltrow in Duets, and Rosanna Arquette in The Whole Nine Yards.
Why Even Try award winners:
Chow Yun Fat and Jurgen Prochnow in their English language movies and Jean Claude Van Damme in everything he’s ever done.
Have a favorite? Let me know! Post a comment! Please!
